intentions of deception …
de·cep·tion –noun
1. the act of deceiving; the state of being deceived.
2. something that deceives or is intended to deceive; fraud; artifice.
Obligitory thank you to dictionary dot com for the above definition. Your aware of a very important event that is coming in the future. You know who is coming and you when and where. You know who to get in contact with to ensure that you are able to attend the event. You know other people who will be there and how they are getting there as well. As the day moves closer to the event you still have chosen to do nothing. A week or so before the event you start a mad scramble to try and figure out some way to get yourself in. By this time the aforemetioned avenues of availability are closed. So trying the other possibilities. Those are closed as well. Finally coming down to the fact that you know some high profile people on a semi informal basis, your going to try to manuver you way into said event. By using deception. Pretending to be someone your not. Using a form of stealth to gain access. When being fully aware that the only person your fooling is yourself. Having asked others close to you if your real intentions are obvious, and being told point blank, yes. Yet still maintaining course, even knowing that everyone else around is fully aware of who and what you are. So you have to ask yourself again who are you fooling ? After a very long time of lying, cheating, and generally going against all precepts that were taken as serious, you have to wonder why ? Again knowing full well there really is nothing here to be gained. Sometimes we get so wrapped up in our own delusions of granduer and self deception, we loose track of who we are and why we even started down this road to begin with. Then the inevitable occurs the final crash down to the bottom. Everyone is gone and nothing is left. A broken shell of a person, all the potential, and everything going for you, its all gone and over. Your left confused and alone. Except you still have one thing that has never left, that was always there waiting for you to come back. You knew it would never leave, no matter how hard you tried, no matter how much you desperatly wanted to believe. Deception.
S.
