Thats all there is to say. I hate this world and all you idiots that helped to create it. This life is meaningless and pointless, and the sooner its over the better. Die.

Theres this crazy old fool that works at, well I wouldnt call what he does actual ‘work’, anyways, when he gets mad, which is quite frequent, he always mutters – you people dont really know just who I am. Funny thing is I think we really do. More so than he does at this stage. People will always tell you exactly who they are by their actions. Ignore what they say, it usually means nothing.

S.

I was at work having a polite conversation with a co-worker, and at one point they say they dont like men with long hair. Now myself I have long hair, and rather like it that way. Funny thing is Im not really sure why this entered into the conversation. Considering we were talking about the band nine inch nails. You know how when someone says something that they didnt want to or mean to say, and for a split second they sort of have a look of shock in their eyes ? Well that was the look I got after the aforementioned comment. Now I could say well, I dont like dumb sluts. Did I ? no. A few of the other co-workers I have say the same thing, and I wonder, do they think this ? I find people have two faces. One for work, and one for the rest of the world. Whats funny is, ever since I was told that my appearance is displeasing, not a word has been spoken to me. Unless of course its necessary to do so. Sometimes I really wonder what goes on in most peoples minds.

S.

I was sitting in the monastery that I goto this morning. We were having a special dharma lecture from our head lama. Of course the three known satanists were all there, pretending to be part of the sangha as usual. Now keep in mind satanists are about three things. Getting everything they can for themselves, evil, and violent force. So why are they in a buddhist monastery ? Good question, as I wonder the same thing. I prefer a unique analogy for the matter. The evil man stands at the shore with his jar of poison and dumps it in to the ocean thinking he can contaminate it all. Truly this is the view of and errand of fools. In a similar fashion I have a co-worker who`s only motivation for work is greed. Yet they refer to themselves as ‘a good christian’. So the view of the two individuals is quite different, yet in essence and motivation they are the same.  The four conditions of impermanence state thus – That which is united is separated, that which is accumulated is consumed, that which rises must fall, and that which is born eventually dies. So as you can plainly see, the true nature of reality is impermanence. Grasping at, and desiring anything is pointless, as it will leave your possession one day. Much like your life.

S.

A guy walks up to a zen master and asks, “Is there life after death?” The zen master says, “How should I know?” The guy replies indignantly “Because your a zen master!” “Yes,” says the zen master, “but not a dead one.”

S.

There is so much new music just pouring out for the summer. Just silly. I`m seriously going broke here. Such is. Chord have finally released their debut album ‘flora’. Its everything I was expecting.

S.

There are about a dozen people in my immediate surroundings of this daily life, that I wanted to make an offering to. I know they wont accept and most surely will reject. The beautiful thing about it is, Im not conditioned by all the social niceties that you and the rest are conditioned and bound by. My offering is thus – Go Fuck Yourselves.

S.

And I see it coming around the corner again, and I`m trying to pretend its not really  coming again. I find I can block it out and ignore, the noise of the day is a great distraction. Until again the silence comes. Showing me the inward face, facing in. Seeing all the things I chose not to. Trying not to see again, the same repeating pattern. The veil of illusion is a pleasant path to be lead astray. So unlocking the door, being found again. Inward facing what I despise more than anything else. Myself.

S.

We are like spiders.

We weave our life and then move along in it.

We are like the dreamer who dreams and then lives in the dream.

This is true for the entire universe.

S.

I don`t know why, everytime I see a picture of  of the current dalai lama, it makes me smile.

S.